Studmarks

Monday, 16 April 2012

Week 35: OFFL Cup Results

Neil mcConaghy is Manager of the Week with 30 points for his BM Mingmongs. Inter Milandrover manages to hold on to the number one spot by slim bit of a slender thing.

This truly is the Squeaky Bum part of the season.

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OFFL Cup Quarter Final Results
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BM Mingmongs 30 v 17 Stay Poyet Stay!
Chi'Knees Czechers 18 v 24 Shamone Muddy Funksters
Lashings of Cheese 16 v 11 Phillham
Double's United 7 v 22 Radnorshire Tigers

Which means Neil McConaghy's joy continues into the Semi Finals with Dave Clayton's, Chris Walsh's and Alun Edwards'.

There's so much at stake! http://j.mp/zpilrb

T h e T a b l e
Value Points
Team Manager (GBPm)Wk Tot
--------------------------------------------------------
1 Inter Milandrover Smasher 52.8 19 424
2 Norma Snockers FC Sarah Bingham 55.0 19 421
3 Stay Poyet Stay! Nick Reed 53.4 17 393
4 Radnorshire Tigers Alun Edwards 53.7 22 376
5 Shamone Muddy FunkstersDave Clayton 53.8 24 374
6 BM Mingmongs Neil McConaghy 53.8 30 361
7 ADFC Adriana Chittelboro 53.7 18 358
8 Livercoolio Russell Bielby 53.6 29 354
9 All Hail The Chairman Rob Ivison 55.0 19 338
10 Sheep City Martyn Field 54.5 8 336

Week 34: 400 Points

Smasher, caressing his way to the tip I mean top

It's taken some weeks of jiggery pokery in the transfer market but Inter Milandrover have finally managed to pinch, poach and caress the number one spot from Norma Snockers. Could it be this year, THIS YEAR, that the ever-present, under-rewarded Inter Milandrover nick the title in the last few weeks?

Well, clearly we can't actually answer that question until the season finishes but it wasted an opening paragraph that upstaged the real news which is that Alun Edwards has ONCE AGAIN become Manager of the Week! His Tigers notched up 19 points. MORE than any other team.

I don't know what this unnecessary capitalisation is all about either.

SO, to the cup.

TO THE CUP! [better]

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OFFL Cup Third Round
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Quarter Finals, Wk35

BM Mingmongs v Stay Poyet Stay!
Chi'Knees Czechers v Shamone Muddy Funksters
Lashings of Cheese v Phillham
Double's United v Radnorshire Tigers

Interesting to see that the two Czech boys are still in the [egg] hunt. And they'd do a better job of it for a cheaper price and be happier for it too, I can tell you.

Also interesting to note that you will have no time to make any transfers for this round. That was generous of the Chairman, wasn't it?

T h e T a b l e
Value Points
Team Manager (GBPm)Wk Tot
--------------------------------------------------------
1 Inter Milandrover Smasher 52.8 18 405
2 Norma Snockers FC Sarah Bingham 54.7 10 402
3 Stay Poyet Stay! Nick Reed 53.4 17 376
4 Radnorshire Tigers Alun Edwards 53.7 19 354
5 Shamone Muddy FunkstersDave Clayton 53.8 11 350
6 ADFC Adriana Chittelboro 53.7 2 340
7 BM Mingmongs Neil McConaghy 53.8 9 331
8 Sheep City Martyn Field 54.5 11 328
9 Livercoolio Russell Bielby 53.6 16 325
10 Upmintster United Minty Colquhoun 54.1 -1 322

Week 33: Five Points In It

The tension mounts...

There comes a point in a season when everyone, here at OFFL HQ, can feel something odd happen. It's often accompanied by a shiver down the back of the spine. And indeed it is this week that a shift in the mood of the gods has been detected.

A Turning Point.

Usually, of course, when a Turning Point happens the very next week it all goes back to normal and we realise it was just the clocks going forward.

So this season's 'turning point' [which, this time next week, we'll know has come to nothing and has evaporated into a small cloud of ruddy-cheeked, embarrassed nostalgia] is the news that our Manager of the Week this week is Inter Milandrover's Smasher with a score of 18 points.

...for some managers at any rate.

Why the 'turning point'? I hear you ask... well, Smasher's team of Every-Years are Second in the League and have been eating away at the lead of Norma Snockers for a while. It's been this week however that just as he gives notice to one of his players [Larsson SUN] then said player scores two goals for him as a farewell present. Not only that but the player coming in scores yet another week's goal as if to say 'look at what's coming into your team sunshine'. And now Smasher's MotW!

Basically, things are going a bit too right for Inter Milandrover. It has to stop.

Top two teams are now 5 points apart.

In other news, Highest Climber this week scales up SIX places in the league landing Alun Edwards in sixth place. Fame at last.

Don't look at Adriana Chittelborough. She'll get upset.

T h e T a b l e
Value Points
Team Manager (GBPm)Wk Tot
--------------------------------------------------------
1 Norma Snockers FC Sarah Bingham 54.7 6 392
2 Inter Milandrover Smasher 53.2 18 387
3 Stay Poyet Stay! Nick Reed 53.4 17 359
4 Shamone Muddy FunkstersDave Clayton 53.8 9 339
5 ADFC Adriana Chittelboro 53.7 -3 338
6 Radnorshire Tigers Alun Edwards 53.7 13 335
7 Upmintster United Minty Colquhoun 54.1 9 323
8 BM Mingmongs Neil McConaghy 53.8 5 322
9 Sheep City Martyn Field 54.5 -1 317
10 All Hail The Chairman Rob Ivison 55.0 15 313

Week 32: Chasing Norma Snockers

Norma Snockers

Inter Milandrover's constant pursuit of Norma Snockers shows Smasher greedily closing in on the lovely Ms Bingham. If you listen carefully you can hear him huffily breathe on his already-cupped hands to warm them in anticipation.

And while Smasher tries to be a top boy, It's A Snickers do nothing to quash the rumours that manager Ashley wants to be a Bottom Boy as he decides to change his team around the very week they score a healthily enormous score of 24 points.

Manager of the Week this week again... is Alun Edwards. With some very Gylfull tactics he's pushed his team into a 36 point weekly haul. That's mahoosive. Well, it is for most of you.

Inter Milandrover is chasing

And finally, we, here at Studmarks, have noticed that all top ten teams have tip-toed past the 300 point mark. And when one considers that last season's Champions won the League with 422 points, this season must be coming to an end soon. Surely?

Rick Beecroft. Eye. Ball. The. Off.

T h e T a b l e
Value Points
Team Manager (GBPm)Wk Tot
--------------------------------------------------------
1 Norma Snockers FC Sarah Bingham 54.7 19 386
2 Inter Milandrover Smasher 53.2 28 369
3 Stay Poyet Stay! Nick Reed 53.4 13 342
4 ADFC Adriana Chittelboro 53.7 18 341
5 Shamone Muddy FunkstersDave Clayton 53.8 15 330
6 Radnorshire Tigers Alun Edwards 53.7 36 322
7 Sheep City Martyn Field 54.5 8 318
8 BM Mingmongs Neil McConaghy 53.8 22 317
9 Upmintster United Minty Colquhoun 54.1 19 314
10 Livercoolio Russell Bielby 54.1 12 305

Week 31: OFFL Cup Second Round Results

ALL HAIL THE CHAIRMAN! ...[the team] has just rewarded its manager with a Manager of the Week Certificate. Indeed, Rob Ivison drove his men on to a 21 point haul with a climb of five places and will now be in receipt of a £25 Ferrari voucher. Though that last bit is just a rumour.

Were he to have been in the OFFL Cup Second Round he would surely have gone through to the next round. But before we get on to that we observe that Wardy's Wanderers are now just 3 points away from rising off the bottom of the table. We're certain that Ashley Keeler is currently running around trying to think of sensible infers to make.

Yes, he's probably doing that right now.

Now.

Now.

What about NOW...

OFFL Cup Second Round Results

Upmintster United 6 v 9 Radnorshire Tigers

Minty Colquhoun Alun Edwards

Chi'Knees Czechers 6 v 4 Livercoolio

Jirka Opatrny Russell Bielby

Decimated Left Peg 0 v 11 Stay Poyet Stay!

Neil Jukes Nick Reed

Big Mally 6 v 6 BM Mingmongs*

Malcolm Pratt Neil McConaghy

Lashings of Cheese 9 v 8 Norma Snockers FC

Chris Walsh Sarah Bingham

Phillham 12 v 7 Poyekhali

Filip Vejdovský Lester Clark

Freddie's Dreamers 6 v 9 Double's United

Francis Fox Rachel Jones

Shamone Muddy Funksters 9 v 6 Woolyback Town AFC

Dave Clayton Guy Harewood

*Goes through on Points per Pound

So, Congratulations go to all the victors who now make it through to the Quarter Finals of the OFFL Cup. You are now a step closer to winning the OFFL Cup Winners prize. You lucky LUCKY PEOPLE!

First Prize: AllStars Football Book from 1975, intro by Colin Todd

Second Prize: a CD of popular Football anthems

Click 'ere to avva butchers at these little beauties

http://goo.gl/ZiQr9

Norma Snockers Knocked Out. What a sarcastic shame.

T h e T a b l e

Value Points

Team Manager (GBPm)Wk Tot

--------------------------------------------------------

1 Norma Snockers FC Sarah Bingham 54.7 8 367

2 Inter Milandrover Smasher 53.2 12 341

3 Stay Poyet Stay! Nick Reed 53.4 11 329