Week 12: Help me please, OFFL staff are evil.

This is being typed by Work Experience Boy.  Help me please, OFFL staff are evil.

I am contractually obliged to point out that Manager of the Week for Week 12 is Sarah Bielby for getting her Johnny's Heroes to score 47 points.


Got to go.  Foreman is reaching for his whip.


T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                 Manager             (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Moanchester United   Alex Blundell        49.4 39  457
 2 Neil's Diamonds      Neil McConaghy       49.7 31  437
 3 Pyeators             Dave Clayton         50.0 32  432
 4 Brighton Beautiful   Karyn Meaden-Pratt   49.9 40  408
 5 RS-TBOY              Rick Beecroft        49.8 31  399
 6 Bayern Bru           Guy Harewood         49.6 30  398
 7 Johnny's Heroes      Sarah Bielby         47.7 47  390
 8 Inter Milandrover    Smasher              49.2 29  385
 9 Livercoolio          Russell Bielby       49.6 36  384
10 Rushden Academicals 2Malcolm Meaden-Pratt 49.9 27  376

Week 10 & 11: Mum has gone to Iceland

Qualified Ahead of Scotland

We're back.  We're back from watching two terribly tedious and turgid nil-nil England games followed by the final toilet-flush of the rest of the Home Nations' attempts at World Cup Qualification.  All except Ireland of course.  They qualified...

...oh hang on.  Not Ireland.  Iceland.  We meant Iceland.

Iceland qualified.  You hear that Scotland?  ICELAND.

Even Bejam qualified before Scotland.

Oops again.  We mean Belgium.  BELGIUM.

The distant dirge of desolate tumbleweeding from the usual goal-pated prattling pundits has perked upwardly thanks to a fine week of Premiershippery.  Even Birthday Boy Mike Smears managed to notch up a score of over 50 points.  Hardly a [bald]patch, however, on this week's Manager of the Week.  Yes, Alex Blundering Blundell transfers in the Pope before going ahead and scoring a heavenly mahoosiff 81 points.  This takes his Moanchester United right to the top of the Table.

With healthy scores continuing to arrive for both former leaders Neil's Diamonds and Pyeators a real gap is opening between the leading pack and the panting pelaton of pursuers arrear.

And THAT is as exciting as we can make Week 11 sound.

<honk honk>

Oof.

T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                 Manager             (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Moanchester United   Alex Blundell        49.4 81  418
 2 Neil's Diamonds      Neil McConaghy       49.7 60  406
 3 Pyeators             Dave Clayton         50.0 52  400
 4 Bayern Bru           Guy Harewood         49.6 65  368
 5 RS-TBOY              Rick Beecroft        49.8 64  368
 6 Brighton Beautiful   Karyn Meaden-Pratt   49.9 55  368
 7 Inter Milandrover    Smasher              49.2 57  356
 8 Rushden Academicals 2Malcolm Meaden-Pratt 49.9 40  349
 9 Livercoolio          Russell Bielby       49.6 48  348
10 Johnny's Heroes      Sarah Bielby         47.7 48  343

Week 09: Muffled Struggling

Spot The Karyn

Can anybody hear that?  

A stunningly morbid muffled struggling.

As if someone is flailing to get out from under something big and heavy.

It could be that lovely Karyn Meaden-Pratt finally climbing atop her hellish husband, Mally.  Mrs is Fourth, Mr is Filth. Fifth. He's Fifth.

In squelching her squashed body out from under the massive Malster the three-worded Karyn Meaden-Pratt wins a joint-Manager of the Week certificate.  Joining her in this joint honour is the more economically-worded Smasher. Both Brighton Beautiful and Inter Milandrover respectively and jointly scored 51 points.

And now we wait for the silence of yet another International Break to break.

Is any of this really worth it?

T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                 Manager             (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Pyeators             Dave Clayton         50.0 38  348
 2 Neil's Diamonds      Neil McConaghy       49.7 42  346
 3 Moanchester United   Alex Blundell        49.9 45  337
 4 Brighton Beautiful   Karyn Meaden-Pratt   49.9 51  313
 5 Rushden Academicals 2Malcolm Meaden-Pratt 49.9 25  309
 6 RS-TBOY              Rick Beecroft        49.8 42  304
 7 Bayern Bru           Guy Harewood         49.6 44  303
 8 Livercoolio          Russell Bielby       49.6 39  300
 9 Inter Milandrover    Smasher              49.2 51  299
10 Johnny's Heroes      Sarah Bielby         47.7 44  295

Week 08: Leave it

You heard me

This was going to be a really informative and witty update.  It was.  Honest.  What do you mean you don't believe me?  Right.  Well.  That's given me the right hump.  I'll leave it there then shall I?  You can whistle for it if you're going to be like that.  See if I care.

Yeah.

You heard me.

[Alun Edwards is Manager of the Week with 51 points.  I still don't care]

T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                 Manager             (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Pyeators             Dave Clayton         50.0 33  310
 2 Neil's Diamonds      Neil McConaghy       49.7 44  304
 3 Moanchester United   Alex Blundell        49.9 33  292
 4 Rushden Academicals 2Malcolm Meaden-Pratt 49.9 26  284
 5 RS-TBOY              Rick Beecroft        49.8 33  262
 6 Brighton Beautiful   Karyn Meaden-Pratt   49.9 29  262
 7 Livercoolio          Russell Bielby       49.6 32  261
 8 Suits You Sur-man    Sarah Bingham        49.3 33  260
 9 Bayern Bru           Guy Harewood         49.6 35  259
10 Moobchester United   Jon King             49.9 40  255