The OFFL Rules were nailed up for all to see |
Back in the old days, in spite of the Hallowed OFFL Rules being nailed to a Wittenburg Castle church door for all to see [pre-internet obviously], if a manager was to try and submit a transfer, or set of transfers, that would render his or her team illegitimate, an immediate Point Fine would be levied upon that manager's team.
Since then, and after a particularly nefarious spate of attempts to get illegal teams past Our Most Gracious Chairman, the latest technology was applied in developing the tools to make it almost impossible for a normal Homo Sapiens to come up with a wrong selection. We're talking about the dastardly sophisticated 'SelectYourTeam' spreadsheet.
Since the widespread use of this spreadsheet tool, no manager has submitted an erroneous team.
Well, most erring errers are allowed at least one second chance at any rate. But when that errer makes a second attempt to slip an illegality [without even the offer of a bribe] past the Chairman then it's time to warm up the wagging finger.
And this season, the digit of discipline indignantly dithers in the face of Rick Beecroft - after trying to get three Chelsea players into his team, he then changed tack and went for three Arsenal players instead.
After firstly dropping hints to 'Studmarks' journalists, the OFFL Police were on to the situation immediately.
OFFL HQ have issued an instant 30 point fine to RST-BOY, pending an appeal. Beecroft commented "I'll have your job for this you pleb", directing his ire at a uniformed Umpa Lumpa.
The Chairman was unavailable for comment though was observed, through a thick cloud of cigar smoke, leaning back in his reclining throne with a smug grin on his chubby little face.
Manager of the Week this week is Malcolm Pratt. He steered his sterling steers to a weekly steerage of 13 points moving his FC Maalcoma into second pace in the league.
Highest climbers are Neil McConaghy's Neil's Diamonds and Sarah Bingham's Multiple Scorgasms: both up five places.
T h e T a b l e
Value Points
Team Manager (GBPm)Wk Tot
--------------------------------------------------------
1 Radnorshire Tigers Alun Edwards 54.5 -1 45
2 FC Maalcoma Malcolm Pratt 54.8 13 42
3 Double's United Rachel Jones 54.1 7 38
4 WWMC Steve Tierney 54.6 12 35
5 Johnny's Heroes Sarah-Jane John 54.5 5 33
6 Minted Minty Colquhoun 55.0 10 32
7 Olympilimps FC Gavin Ward 52.6 9 30
8 Neil's Diamonds Neil McConaghy 54.9 11 29
9 Inter Milandrover Smasher 53.7 6 25
10 Multiple Scorgasms Sarah Bingham 54.4 10 24
12 RST-BOY Rick Beecroft 54.9 0 23
13 It's A Snickers Ashley Keeler 54.9 -2 21
14 Moobchester United John King 54.7 2 20
15 West Vam Tom Vamos 43.7 3 18
16 Moreton Rovers Edgar Rayner 51.4 7 10
16 Pyeators Dave Clayton 54.8 3 10
18 Irishpool Mike Smears 54.8 6 9
19 Livercoolio Russ Bielby 54.6 7 8
20 Botley Yellow Kate Wilson 54.2 -1 6
Week's Average Points 5
Total Average Points 24
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