Monday, 23 November 2015

Week 15 & 16: NOW can I have my Beano?

Like a stroppy teenager naively flaunting its newly found pseudo-independence, Studmarks strolls nonchalantly back into your inbox without a hint of an explanation of where it has been since you let go of its hand at the checkout while you fished out the correct coins to pay for its usual copy of The Beano.

We shall wait till our father gets home for the punishment, yes.

NOW can we have our Beano please, Mum?

Manager of the Week this week is Jon King.  His Moobchester United scored a wobblingly chubbing 21 points pushing his Moobs up firmly into sixth.  Not a bad platform for this week's transfers, eh Mr King?

And OFFL Cup News... Genuine prize in the offing for OFFL Cup this year, as donated to the cause by a current manager who wishes to remain blameless - Ali McMoist's. The autobiography of the current Manchester United Manager, Louis Van Goal.  Brand new copy and everything.  Unfingered. Unsoiled. And for those who have received their OFFL Cup Winners prizes in the past: Unbelievable.


T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                       Manager       (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Minty's Minions            Minty Colquhoun 49.8 19 162
 2 Pyeators                   Dave Clayton    53.9 11 142
 3 Inter Milandrover          Smasher         54.8 20 132
 4 Guess Hughton              Nick Reed       53.9 18 126
 5 Com-a ma mau papa com-a mauGuy Harewood    52.1 20 117
 6 Moobchester United         Jon King        54.6 21 117
 7 Old Malcolm Academicals    Malcolm Pratt   54.8 15 117
 8 Seb Blattered Cod          Gavin Ward      54.3 12 115
 9 Livercoolio                Russell Bielby  54.7  7 113
10 RS-TBOY                    Rick Beecroft   52.2  4 108
11 Radnorshire Tigers         Alun Edwards    55.0  9 107
12 Moreton Rovers             Edgar Rayner    54.6 16 106
13 Ali McMoist                Alison Faulkner 54.9 11 100
14 The Flying Geese           Mandy Noble     53.9 12  97
15 Which Team                 Rachel Jones    53.3  9  94
16 Neil's Diamonds            Neil McConaghy  53.2  3  91
17 Irishpool                  Mike Smears     52.0 13  85
18 Moanchester United         Alex Blundell   54.9 11  76
19 Real Mcdrid                Craig McHugh    51.5 12  75
20 Oak Hamsters               Steve Tierney   51.3  9  67
21 It's a Snickers FC         Ashley Keeler   49.6  0  58
22 Bad Wolf United            Karyn Meaden    53.7  2  54


                              Week's Average Points    11
                              Total Average Points    102

---

-----------------------------
T r a n s f e r s   a n d   s t u f f
=============================

Com-a ma mau papa com-a mau
-------------------
   From: Guy Harewood
     To: Chairman@LittleSmasher.com

'Ey up,

Out Redmond - In Coutinho 459
Out Fonte - In Smalling 342

Ta,

Ray

----------------------
Chairman responds:
You're welcome.

=============================
For Monday 23rd November...

Pyeators
-------------------
   From: Dave Clayton
     To: Chairman@LittleSmasher.com
Subject: 


Hi Mr Chairman sir,

I've had a sneaky tip about an up and coming hot talent and i'd like to get him in my side before anyone else jumps on the bandwagon!!! Can you please transfer;

Payet 558 Out - Mahrez 445 In

Cheers

Dave.

----------------------
Chairman responds:
This is sensible transferage like I've never seen.

And if anyone's never seen it, it's me.

=============================

Moobchester United
-------------------
   From: Jon King
     To: Chairman@LittleSmasher.com
Subject: Transfers


Hi Chair,

Hope all is well with you.

Every week I think I must transfer out Luke Shaw, and sure enough, every week on a Monday evening I think blast I've forgotten to do transfers again.  This week though I have remembered.  So here they are:

Out:
129 Fabianski
275 Shaw
440 Montero

In:
189 De Gea
264 Walker
445 Mahrez

Regards,

Jon
----------------------
Chairman responds:
You're shaw about Luke Sure, aren't you?  And FlappyHandski?  Of course you are.  Time to climb [the table]!

=============================

Minty's Minions
-------------------
   From: Minty Colquhoun
     To: Chairman@LittleSmasher.com

Ey, up

Out Payet - In Coutinho 459
Out Benteke - In Kane 603

Ta,

Mint

----------------------
Chairman responds:

You and Guy Harewood use the same PR Agency don't you?

No comments:

Post a Comment