Monday, 16 November 2009

WEEK 14: Johnny's Zeroes


On most Guy Fawkes Nights, our most gracious Chairman is very much like a pre-spooked Ebenezer at Christmas.

Wrapped up in a thick winter coat, woolly scarf strangling his throat into nothing but grumpsome gurgles, wheezingly wondering how on earth his personal nurse had come to the conclusion that an outside stroll to see the fireworks would be of any enjoyment to him whatsoever.  Whiz Bang Bah Humbug!

However, this year, something happened to distract the tedious ooh-ing and aah-ing at the overhead explosions.  Whilst trying to stealthily extend a would-be thieving mitten-clad hand in the direction of a distracted child's half-eaten hot dog, The Chairman suddenly caught sight of the only remaining telephone box in town.  Not particularly attention seeking on its own you might think but on this occasion Our Most Sober Chairman was taken aback.

Within the telephone box was a whirling woman blurrily spinning into a change of blue and red.

Suppressing his urge to rebuke her for occupying a telephone box without any intention of using it for its designated purpose, our Chairman watched astounded as the door opened to reveal the Manager of Johnny's Heroes, Sarah John [pictured] step out dressed as Supergirl, sniffing the cold air for a fantasy team to save.

Indeed, our erstwhile superzero has turned her attention to her own outfit of fantasy failures.

At last.

In a press statement she claimed that the overpowering smell of gunpowder on the night had inspired her to "put a rocket up my team and bring much needed sparkle to the languishing damp embers which has become Johnnies Heroes".

Six transfers followed.

And to be honest, that's really all we, here at Studmarks, had for you this week:  "Sarah John submits six transfers".  But, well, you know how it is once the Chairman has one of his hallucinations.

More interestingly, perhaps, the Manager of the Week certificate is being torn up, with each piece being shared out amongst Alex Blundell, Nick Reed, Alun Edwards, Dan Manns, Sarah John, Gavin Ward and Adrian Bradley.  All of whom managed to steer their respective teams into scoring an enormous 3 points.

Aww Bless.

We thank the distorting effect of yet another 'International Week'.

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