Week 1

While the administrative machine of the OFFL gets its annual service before spluttering into action and hitting the main highways and byways of the fantasy road system, The Chairman has decided to go on a recruitment drive for more Umpa Lumpas. This time, in France.

For some unfathomable reason, ever since the new TV contracts pumped in even more money into the game it's been extremely tricky to get the level of home grown Umpa Lumpaism required for the job. Overseas Lumpas are so much cheaper. And this year, after scrutinising many an Umpa Lumpa video sent by his scout Tyte Gripp, Our Chairman is ready to interview.

And so, while we peruse and admire our early League leaders, we shall await the return of the great Chairman later this month. In the meantime, the second tranche of teams have arrived and will be scoring away with the rest of you as soon as they can.

And just to keep the apathy at bay a little bit longer there are unconfirmed rumours that a special prize is being donated to the OFFL Cup Prize fund. And we think it might be a Shoot annual.

That's it. A SHOOT annual.

Carry on.